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(Photo: Chris Haston/Courtesy of NBC (Animal Practice); Getty Images (Red Sox); Lucie Jansch (Einstein on the Beach); Tyler Golden/Courtesy of NBC (The Voice); Time Mosenfelder/Getty Images (Bon Iver).) |
September:
1
Since you’re probably not at the final performance of Into the Woods at the Delacorte, sate yourself until its possible Broadway transfer with pork at “Pig Island” (on Governors Island).
2
You probably can’t get into the final night of Tony-winning, gentrification-agita play Clybourne Park, either. So how about Swedish pop duo Roxette? At the Beacon.
3
Mortality, the almost-too-well-named book by Christopher Hitchens, is out this week.
4
Dem convention starts today. Turn down the TV and zone out to Animal Collective’s Centipede Hz or Cat Power’s Sun.
5
BAM’s new black-box space, the Fishman (which, confusingly, is in the Fisher building!), opens tonight. And what better to see in a black box than a dance-art collaboration called Eclipse?
6
Sometimes, drunk shopping is the only thing that can bring us all together. It’s the fourth annual Fashion’s Night Out! Meanwhile, intensively dressed people from all over the world begin hanging around Lincoln Center hoping to be noticed by street-style photo-bloggers as Fashion Week begins.
7
Bradley Cooper does not, thank God, play Fareed Zakaria in The Words, a drama about literary plagiarism. And Melanie Lynskey does not, thank God, play Katie Couric in the cougar flick Hello I Must Be Going.
8
Sensitive-eyed sexpot Jake Gyllenhaal makes his U.S. stage debut in If There Is I Haven’t Found It Yet. Sensitive-tressed designer Alexander Wang has his show at Pier 94.
9
Endings and beginnings: the final day of the U.S. Open; New York Film Festival tickets go on sale.
10
The Voice is back tonight! DVR Cee Lo Green and his Dr. Evil kitty while you’re at the 92nd Street Y listening to Alicia Keys’s real-life voice.
11
Bob Dylan’s Tempest blows today.
12
That’s a wrap! Diane Von Furstenberg speaks at the 92Y.
13
Ralph Lauren and Calvin Klein close out Fashion Week. Paul Rudd and Ed Asner star in Grace, about a chain of gospel-themed motels in Florida. (Maybe they should have just bought a Chick-fil-A franchise?)
14
For those not over high school: Channing Tatum, Jenna Dewan-Tatum, and Chris Pratt go to a reunion in Ten Years. For those not over being an undergrad: Josh Radnor and Elizabeth Olsen in Liberal Arts. For those not over what Xenu did to the thetans (or Tom Cruise did to Katie Holmes?), see The Master. For those not over Madoff: Richard Gere in Arbitrage. For those not over Philip Glass: Einstein on the Beach at BAM.
15
Fat cats beware! Those scruffy idealists at Occupy Wall Street return for three days of events by the Stock Exchange commemorating the protest’s first anniversary.
16
Welcome Rosh Hashanah and the return of HBO’s Boardwalk Empire.
17
J. J. Abrams imagines a world in which every piece of technology blinks out in a show called Revolution—which should make you glad your TV still works.
18
Throwback-music day! Ben Folds Five’s reunion record, The Sound of the Life of the Mind, is out, as is deadpan diva Aimee Mann’s Charmer. Performance-art crooner Kalup Linzy warms up the crowd for the Met’s “Regarding Warhol” exhibit with his Warhol Cabaret in the museum’s Petrie Court Café.
19
Will it be chilly enough to break out your flannel? Urban woodsman–folkie Bon Iver plays Radio City.
20
Not a chancy endeavor: seeing the John Cage Composer Portrait, at Miller Theatre tonight.
21
Still full of teen angst? Ezra Miller and Emma Watson in The Perks of Being a Wallflower.
22
Passive-aggressive suburban ennui boils over onstage in Detroit, a Pulitzer finalist starring David Schwimmer and Amy Ryan.
23
Everybody else who lives on the F train but you has written a novel. Celebrate this fact at the Brooklyn Book Festival.
24
Dramatic diva Anna Netrebko plays for laughs in Donizetti’s L’Elisir d’Amore, the centerpiece of tonight’s Metropolitan Opera gala.
25
Belgian-Australian oddball pop sensation Gotye plays Radio City tonight, his heart still broken. Unrelated: Yom Kippur!
26
Gather the cats ’round the tube for the premiere of NBC’s vetcom, Animal Practice, and discuss interspecies moral reciprocity.
27
Bring your imaginary son to Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf?, which starts previews today.
28
Jay-Z claims the throne in the county of Kings with his coronation concert at Barclays Center. Ang Lee’s 3-D Life of Pi (with a tiger on a lifeboat!) opens the New York Film Festival.
29
Can you wear pasties on the subway? Drag king Murray Hill hosts the “Saturday Spectacular” of the New York Burlesque Festival at B.B. King.
30
Or strip down in the privacy of your own home and settle in for a night of TV: The Good Wife, Dexter, and Homeland return, and the other satanically possessed real-estate show (besides Million Dollar Listing) 666 Park Avenue premieres.
